Christ is a marshmallow.

My fascination with religion is well documented in this blog. Not growing up with any kind of formal religion, Easter was just another holiday with candy and magic beings sneaking into your home, concluding with a ham. It wasn’t until later that I found out that other popular part of Easter.

Friends did the whole Easter Sunday thing. I hopped (heh) around to a couple different churches for Easter. I think my favorite was a friend’s “New Wave” Catholic church that was in an old movie theater. They had fancy lights and songs with a small band. We’re talking legit production value. They set up the scene: Jesus. Betrayed. Left to die on the cross and then shoved into a cave when- OH NO! TUNE IN NEXT TIME KIDS.

The mass was a two parter. I missed the second day.

But this mass is when I came to really understand the story of Easter. I knew the basics, but was pretty vague on the details. I remember at a couple points during mass turning to my friend and saying, “Really?” Trying to straddle that line of not being disrespectful, but to an outsider… Catholicism is really, really brutal. Even with 90s rock music undertones.

Jump cut to a few days ago. Browsing Pinterest when I come across this:

emptytombroll

What are these, pray tell? These are resurrection rolls AKA empty tomb rolls. When I saw them, I stopped dead in my tracks. I’m no food anthropologist (or a food blogger) but I’d like to think I’m pretty well versed in sweet snacks. I had never heard of these. I am fascinated. Here’s the general idea:

ingredientsmarshmallowbuttered 

The marshmallow is dipped in butter, rolled in cinnamon sugar, and wrapped in dough. Top with more cinnamon sugar and bake. The heat of the oven melts the marshmallow, which is then absorbed by the dough. When they come out they are empty because THE MARSHMALLOW IS CHRIST AND NOW THE TOMB IS EMPTY HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE.

Using baked goods to teach children about religion? The marshmallow is Christ? I just… how? How did someone arrive at this? When did this become a thing? Was someone tired of hot cross buns and looked at a sack of marshmallows and said, “Wait a second…” I have searched and searched but couldn’t find anything about it. Maybe you guys will know more about it than me. I crave answers. Someone call The Kitchen Sisters! (NPR reference.)

If I had been given treats and taught bible stories when I was a kid, would I have taken to a Christian faith? It’s possible! Catholics do have the juice and crackers going on too. Hrm.

And for the record, Christ’s Tomb was delicious.

Speaking of cakes.

Update: I normally don’t update posts, but since so many have requested a how-to for the Barbie cake, I have made one. You can check it out on this blog post. Thanks for your interest, everyone!

As I have mentioned, I worked for a time at a candy store. Well, candy store slash gift shop. It was GREAT. It had a ton of kitschy little gift items, with which I was well acquainted and very much a fan, but also had tons of candy.

I’ve been a candy fiend since I was a kid. We’d spend our allowances exclusively on candy. Airheads. Warheads. Big League Chew. Jolly Ranchers. Snickers. Reese’s… Anything. The list went on and on. I loved it all. We ran a small candy ring out of our bus when we were in elementary school. We’d buy Airheads at 10 cents at the grocery store and sell it for a quarter. Not bad! It was well-known that they cost 10 cents but we’d start yelling about supply and demand and that was that. Some Christmases ago my parents gave me a Costco case of Airheads as a gift. I ate all 75 of them in a day and a half. In the 8th grade I was in a class where our algebra teacher brought in supplies once from his side business as a vending machine operator. What was a loosely academic discussion of how a business operates turned into selling us candy twice a week in the middle of class. The school eventually asked him to stop.

Candy was my thing. So it was only a matter of time until I worked for a candy store.

Splenda, goddess of sugar

The above photo is from Halloween, sacred holiday of the candy store. I am dressed as the Greek goddess, Splenda. My sandals are Tootsie Roll brand, my scepter a large lollypop, my laurel wreath accented with both fake greenery and small apple and watermelon Laffy Taffy.

The job was great. I love small business retail and I was very knowledgeable of the product. I met so many people like me. We were down the street from Houston’s main medical center, so there were stories related to that, too. People buying ginger chews for family members doing chemo (it helps!), kids running around like tiny terrors because this is the only fun they could have before heading back down the street… One time a guy ran in out of breath looking for a certain licorice for his wife, who was IN LABOR (!) in their car. She wanted him to get “her candy” before they were stuck in the hospital.

And my favorite part of the candy store job? Making candy cakes.

A circus tent made of Wonka candy

Jesus is my lifesaver

We would take foam cake rounds and hot glue on candy. The cake above was a custom order done for a church tea. They said they wanted it Lifesaver themed because, “Jesus was their lifesaver.” They were very pleased with the results.

Barbie Cake

There were other non-round cakes, too. These Barbie cakes were from the mind of my old manager who would buy Barbies and insert them into the Styrofoam mold. The dress design was all me, though. Cool thing is that once the candy was all ripped off and eaten, your kid got to keep the Barbie.

Number Cake

Here you can see this number cake in progress. The uncovered Styrofoam peeking out… Perfect for an 8th birthday.

I really do miss the candy store some days. These cakes allowed me special creativity. Creating something with my hands. Something that starts without a road map that slowly comes together to form something I could take pride in.

8 Cake Finished

I suppose that’s what this blog is, now. A place to store and share my creativity.